fireweed -the most non-whiney flower around

fireweed -the most non-whiney flower around
no pansies allowed

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Sunday, April 20, 2008

That cat's got some balls...

We wake up in the morning, and Charlie has usually pulled almost every toy from his basket and scattered them all around the livingroom...where we proceed to stumble and step over them...

Lately, his selection has seemed quite diminished. We kept seeing the same little mouse over and over again.

Coley decided to look under the hutch.

There were balls everywhere. Crinkle balls made of foil, miniature tennis balls, furry catnip balls, his rainbow ball, his purple fuzzy ball...Coley pulled them out, and now all Charlie wants to do is play with his balls.

There is nothing sadder than a kitty with lost balls.

Thursday, April 17, 2008

That cat's got some nuts...

There are days when Coley is working non-stop on her school stuff, and I play social worker all day-commuting 50 miles each way-and we would both rather have sharp sticks in our eyes than cook-so we resort to fast food. Tuesday was one of those days.

Yes, I KNOW it is not REALLY food-and that we would probably fare better if we just ate lard directly from the can-especially if it is rolled in sugar and dipped in cat litter...

Anyway...

Our little fake ice-cream sundae things came with nuts in a little plastic, crinkly bag.

Apparently our cat thought they were especially for him, and that they made a terrific toy.

He threw his nuts up into the air.

He batted them around on the linoleum floor in the kitchen.

He brought his nuts to Coley and dropped them at her feet- so she would then fling his nuts down the hall, where he would run to retrieve them.

He drooled on his nuts, and carried them around the house. He showed his nuts to his brother, so that his brother would feel envy.

I don't know where his nuts are now, so it could be that he hid them like a demented (and very large) squirrel. I will probably encounter them in the bed...or God forbid, the bag will break and his nuts will explode all over the house.

I may have to put his nuts into the garbage disposal.

Friday, April 11, 2008

Left Turn at Non-Sequiturville


Dementia is an amazing thing. I am highly looking forward to it, so I can wear my underwear on the outside of my clothes.

Anyway-one resident in particular says the most amazing things...and she says them with complete seriousness.

I played guitar for her in my office. She smiled, nodding her head in time to the music, watching thoughtfully (or so I thought), tapping her foot as she sat in her wheelchair.

When I was finished I asked her, "So, how was that?"

She paused for a moment, and stated with a very concerned expression, "That was very nice, but you have no black people on that ukelele."

I wasn't sure how to respond, so mostly I just blinked at her.

At lunch today our Activities Director asked her how the food was. She again struck a thoughtful pose.

"It is very good, but I am turning into a boy."

Hmmm...stay away from the herb chicken.

Sunday, April 06, 2008

flat penguins?

You know how sometimes you can be having a seemingly normal conversation, and then you realize that the thing you just said or heard, taken out of context, might sound REALLY crazy?

So, Coley was watching some penguin movie narrated by Morgan Freeman...a documentary thing...and she was getting REALLY involved in the drama of these penguins migrating long distances for parenting, friendship, food, low gas prices...whatever...

She was becoming attached to these little penguins, involved in their saga, getting to know some of them by name, talking to the television screen ("Waddle little penguin! Waddle for your life!") She was wondering aloud how the documentary filmmakers could react with cool detachment if a penguin was in obvious distress ("Seems to me like you would have to stop and help a penguin out...")

She suddenly turns to me and states, "Can you imagine if you ran over a penguin on the road? How awful you'd feel?"

Well....

Yes..

If I ran over a penguin in the road in Eastern Washington, I would be all kinds of concerned. It is true. For a whole VARIETY of reasons....

It reminds me of when I was staying up on this ranch with an ex. She had a variety of fowl...chickens, ducks, geese...and one morning we heard exceptionally loud squawking. We look out of the window, and two of the feathered critters were going at it with amorous enthusiasm...so without skipping a beat, as she sipped her morning coffee, she states,

"Just so you know, it isn't normal for a chicken to fuck a duck."

Good to know.