Surf..Sand...So hard to take...

So..here we are...on the beautiful Oregon Coast. So much to write, so many boxes to unpack, still getting settled. We have made new friends, found new places...I love my job...I even love driving to the store around here...the "Home of Winter Flowers" they call this place.

Our cats love it too, so all must be right with the world.

Obama-Rama Trauma

Well...it could be worse...

Thanks Doc, for the cartoon! I still always say "Ammonds" instead of "almonds" because of you!

That cat's got crabs!

I could not resist.

Perhaps we will soon have similar scenes unfolding in our very own kitchen.

By the sea.

Did I mention we are moving to the coast?

Is that a starfish in your pocket , or are you just happy to see me?

Man oh man...I cannot wait to get sand in all of my special places!

Going Coastal!

We are moving to the Oregon Coast...

the coast...where there is an ocean (a really big one)...

and trees, rocks, redwoods, fishes, sea lions, sand...

and I will still be working in the same field, same position, new company...

so I will have lots of really cool dementia stories, but they will be dementia stories from the beach.

"Hey, I don't think you are supposed to do that with a jellyfish..."

That cat's got some balls...

We wake up in the morning, and Charlie has usually pulled almost every toy from his basket and scattered them all around the livingroom...where we proceed to stumble and step over them...

Lately, his selection has seemed quite diminished. We kept seeing the same little mouse over and over again.

Coley decided to look under the hutch.

There were balls everywhere. Crinkle balls made of foil, miniature tennis balls, furry catnip balls, his rainbow ball, his purple fuzzy ball...Coley pulled them out, and now all Charlie wants to do is play with his balls.

There is nothing sadder than a kitty with lost balls.

That cat's got some nuts...

There are days when Coley is working non-stop on her school stuff, and I play social worker all day-commuting 50 miles each way-and we would both rather have sharp sticks in our eyes than cook-so we resort to fast food. Tuesday was one of those days.

Yes, I KNOW it is not REALLY food-and that we would probably fare better if we just ate lard directly from the can-especially if it is rolled in sugar and dipped in cat litter...

Anyway...

Our little fake ice-cream sundae things came with nuts in a little plastic, crinkly bag.

Apparently our cat thought they were especially for him, and that they made a terrific toy.

He threw his nuts up into the air.

He batted them around on the linoleum floor in the kitchen.

He brought his nuts to Coley and dropped them at her feet- so she would then fling his nuts down the hall, where he would run to retrieve them.

He drooled on his nuts, and carried them around the house. He showed his nuts to his brother, so that his brother would feel envy.

I don't know where his nuts are now, so it could be that he hid them like a demented (and very large) squirrel. I will probably encounter them in the bed...or God forbid, the bag will break and his nuts will explode all over the house.

I may have to put his nuts into the garbage disposal.

Left Turn at Non-Sequiturville

Dementia is an amazing thing. I am highly looking forward to it, so I can wear my underwear on the outside of my clothes.

Anyway-one resident in particular says the most amazing things...and she says them with complete seriousness.

I played guitar for her in my office. She smiled, nodding her head in time to the music, watching thoughtfully (or so I thought), tapping her foot as she sat in her wheelchair.

When I was finished I asked her, "So, how was that?"

She paused for a moment, and stated with a very concerned expression, "That was very nice, but you have no black people on that ukelele."

I wasn't sure how to respond, so mostly I just blinked at her.

At lunch today our Activities Director asked her how the food was. She again struck a thoughtful pose.

"It is very good, but I am turning into a boy."

Hmmm...stay away from the herb chicken.

flat penguins?

You know how sometimes you can be having a seemingly normal conversation, and then you realize that the thing you just said or heard, taken out of context, might sound REALLY crazy?

So, Coley was watching some penguin movie narrated by Morgan Freeman...a documentary thing...and she was getting REALLY involved in the drama of these penguins migrating long distances for parenting, friendship, food, low gas prices...whatever...

She was becoming attached to these little penguins, involved in their saga, getting to know some of them by name, talking to the television screen ("Waddle little penguin! Waddle for your life!") She was wondering aloud how the documentary filmmakers could react with cool detachment if a penguin was in obvious distress ("Seems to me like you would have to stop and help a penguin out...")

She suddenly turns to me and states, "Can you imagine if you ran over a penguin on the road? How awful you'd feel?"

Well....

Yes..

If I ran over a penguin in the road in Eastern Washington, I would be all kinds of concerned. It is true. For a whole VARIETY of reasons....

It reminds me of when I was staying up on this ranch with an ex. She had a variety of fowl...chickens, ducks, geese...and one morning we heard exceptionally loud squawking. We look out of the window, and two of the feathered critters were going at it with amorous enthusiasm...so without skipping a beat, as she sipped her morning coffee, she states,

"Just so you know, it isn't normal for a chicken to fuck a duck."

Good to know.

meatballs

So, I have to take a dish to work today for potluck in order to do the Friday Jean day, since we have folks from corporate at the facility. Apparently we have been doing the causual Friday thing against corporate orders, and in order to wear jeans while our visitors are here, we had to have our Activity Director come up with some kind of "event"...so today is "Blue Jean Potluck" day. In order to be comfortable today, we all are required to bring in a potluck dish...

A new National Holiday?

Anyway, I had no idea what to bring. Our Director of Nursing suggested crockpot meatballs with BBQ sauce and grape jelly.

After vomiting repeatedly, and asking if she was serious (she was..apparently it is a real recipe), I went to the store and purchased what was needed (meatballs, BBQ sauce, grape jelly...eeeewwww)...

So, I will be wearing jeans today. And I will come bearing funky meatballs.

Coley still has not re-formatted, so 'scuse the archive photos. Little C with the Santa is from when she was with me at work during this past Christmas. I walked around with my guitar, visiting residents and playing carols. Little C suggested that Santa should jam as well.

"Santa Jam" is a good name for a rock band.

kick me arse

Given the fact that this computer will one day soon be formatted, I am pulling these thingies out of the files. I do indeed have explicit instructions not to post pics of Coley without prior editorial approval, and I will probably be pummeled when I arrive home from work this evening.

I think she is beautiful all of the time.

She thinks she is beautiful just about never, and will only accept pictures that were taken on the rare occasion that the planets were aligned just right, the wind was blowing from the correct direction at the appropriate speed, and the molecular density of the ozone was such that it rendered the camera Coley friendly for a brief window in time...

So, I will probably have to delete these if she ever sees them, and she won't let me take her picture again.

I am not sure why I even do this. 'Cept I love her, and when I see he rpicture it makes me smile.

delusions of cougardom

Which one is Charlie?

Assorted Little C's

Still putting up some pics before Coley reformats the computer. The bottom two are from a few Christmases ago. The middle one is the most recent of Little C at Soccer practice after she took the scissors to her own bangs (it must be in the kid handbook that we all do that), and the top was this last spring right after Easter. Gee, I love that kid!

Damnit Janet...You're a...a...you know...

Coley is going to re-format her computer. Unfortunately all of my easily accessible photos will become stuck on a disk, and I will have to make a whole new photo file. So...I needed to post these GREAT shots of DamnitJanet and Maceme taken at a Halloween party in Alaska. Just because....the costumes are outstanding...and they both look sick, twisted, smokin' HOT!

the blurry two of us

I have really got to get a few good pics of Little C and me. Seems a lot of our Christmas shots came out blurry, as if we were bigfoot or something.

Happy New Year! I am going to lose weight, quit smoking, work out, and catch Arloin another delicious bass.