Lesbian Weddings and such

A monthly blog? Anything monthly generally causes me alarm as inciting bloating and irritability.

Speaking of bloating and irritability, I am getting married very soon (August 4th) in Alaska. Just kidding about the bloating and irritability part. Serious about the wedding. Serious. Seriously. I am very, very fortunate. I am going to marry the most beautiful, funny, smart, capable, fashion literate, tall enough to reach stuff on top of the refrigerator, lesbian EVER...even though she nearly fainted when we even committed to MONOGAMY and getting our "fucking rings" (my quote) last year...

If a tree falls in the forest, and no one witnesses it, does it really make a sound? No, this is not a joke about Coley potentially falling over at the wedding...it is actually a deep philosophical question (no, really)...if we exchange vows and promises to each other (promises, promises), but no formal institution recognizes it, are we really married? I say YES!!! I mean, we are going to take each other's names legally, create living wills, join finances, blend families, and fuss over things like hogging the blankets, snoring, frequency of sex, and grocery shopping, ......then I say we ARE married--even if George Bush Jr. wants to make a claim that his relationship is "real" while mine is not. (Insert banjo music here) That IQ challenged, language impaired, arrogant, ignorant, self-righteous (RIGHTeous), socially dangerous, oily asshole. (ummm...ick...) After all, the historical success of the hetero union and family should speak for itself, yes? Now THAT is something to strive for! It has worked so well for women and children especially. Yep, I can see how his "defense fo marriage" stance would do well to, as he would say, make America "the strongerest."

OMG-there is a kitten behind the toy box. More later!