On Holiday

Hello all! Here is a pic of Little C decorating the tree. This was way back (last week) when the ornaments were actually ON the tree, as opposed to all over our apartment. By "all over", I mean ALL OVER...

Kitties LOVE Christmas trees. At least, ours do. They feel some kind of strange affection that requires a LOT of up close and personal attention. Staring. Sniffing. Rubbing. Batting. Chewing. Removing ornaments and finding unusual places to deposit them ALL OVER (oh yes, I covered this part, didn't I) the apartment. Many of the ornaments end up carefully placed in areas most likely to receive foot traffic. I have found myself yelling, after painfully encountering an ornament with bare feet, "FU#%*&G SNOWMAN! PIECE OF SH*& SNOWFLAKE!" It makes for a very festive atmosphere. Really.

We have these tiny snowman ornaments that Little C had deliberately placed (with appropriate attention to balance and eye pleasing aesthetics) on branches throughout the tree. The tree is now without the little snowmen...but our boots, shoes, speaker casings, trashcans, throw rugs, couch cushions, pottery, stuffed animals, pillow cases, fireplace mantle, screen door tracks, the area behind the toilet, under the beds, clothes hampers, suitcases, coffee cups...all of these things have been blessed by the kitties with tiny little snowmen (with sparklies).

I came out of the bedroom this morning, and I heard a faint rustling. I entered the livingroom, and there was Chase, midway up the tree. He froze, both paws firmly around the center (as if he were hugging the tree), and looked at me with a bit of surprise. It was very hard not to laugh as I said something akin to "No, no. Bad, bad kitty. We have discussed this..." and squirted him mercilessly with the water bottle.

Ahhhhh...

So, the sink....

I don't feel quite so incompetent now. A plumber was dispatched by our property manager (Helen Heffalump). It turns out that there was a blockage in the main line between two units here (probably snowmen that the kitties stuffed down the drain). It took the plumber two visits. He ended up going into our neighbor's apartment and running a snake, which ended up emerging right into OUR apartment. This is how he determined that the block was beyond the line directly between our apartments. It was...(insert dramatic music here)....in the "downturn"....

So he used the real plumber corrosive stuff that will burn nosehairs if you even BREATHE it apparently...We can see clearly now our drain is gone.

The plumbers butt crack was actually exposed when he was crawling under our sink during his first effort...You would think they would be aware of the cliche.

I think it must be something that they actually teach in plumbers school. "Often you will find clogs that are occurring beyond the trap. At this point you will need to remove the coupling nuts to better access the straight portion of the piping. Before you kneel down to address the problem, be sure that your pants are sufficiently loose so as to expose your butt crack and burn out the retinas of the people inhabiting the dwelling..."

Our plumber, Cindy, should have been ashamed of herself.

I'm kidding. Unfortunately, our plumber fit the cliche in every way and was probably named either Ralph or Frank.

Happy Holidays and such. I am so glad they are just beginning!